inspiration strikes - a break from the monotony

Friday, February 28, 2003

MATT'S RESOLUTION ON IRAQ

Following is the text of the resolution on IRAQ (INFLUENZA, ROAMING AND QUARRELING) that was approved on Friday:

The United Nation of Matt,

RECALLING all its previous relevant resolutions, in particular its resolution 1 (1977) of 17 Aug. 1977 and all the relevant statements of its President,

RECOGNIZING the threat IRAQ's noncompliance with Council resolutions and proliferation of biological weapons of Matt's destruction poses to internal peace and security,

DEPLORING that IRAQ has not responded to repeated requests by the governing bodies of Matt's immune system, November vaccinations and The Heretofore Established Resolutions And Forms of Legislative Use (THERAFLU), to stand down,

DECIDES that IRAQ has been and remains in material breach of its obligations under relevant resolutions, in particular through IRAQ's failure to cooperate with United Nations nasal inspectors and THERAFLU;

DECIDES FURTHER that IRAQ better get the fuck out of my system before my ski trip to Idaho.

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mattchun 2/28/2003 12:10:00 PM [+] ::
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TAKING THE TROLLEY TO THE NEIGHBORHOOD IN THE SKY

I am a bit of a square. I watched a lot of PBS growing up and I enjoyed Fred Rogers' unique brand of television goodness and sensibility. Sometimes the puppets from the neighborhood-of-make-believe freaked me out a little, but I always got a kick out of trolley's whirs and whistles.

Don your cardigan sweaters, change your shoes and feed your fish; a childhood icon has passed away.
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mattchun 2/27/2003 03:58:00 PM [+] ::
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PERHAPS IT WAS SOMETHING I READ...

Still recuperating from a case of the flu, I've had some time to ponder the source of my illness. Something has been going around the office, but still, it's not that often that I get sick. I think perhaps it may have been something that I read. The three books I read in February didn't exactly lift my spirits. A brief synopsis of the three stories:

1) A Farewell to Arms, Ernest Hemingway. Man is injured in war and falls in love with nurse; appears to be headed for happiness; tragedy strikes.
2) Othello, William Shakespeare. Man is driven insane with jealousy through the machinations of his "honest friend"; man kills wife, self.
3) Metamorphosis, Franz Kafka. Man's trials with work, family and illness are manifested by his transformation into a bug; man becomes increasingly isolated and then dies.

It may be time for a little "happily-ever-after."
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mattchun 2/27/2003 10:38:00 AM [+] ::
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NOT QUITE AS GOOD AS FERRIS BUELLER'S

I used a sick day today. If I'm not mistaken, this was the first sick day I've used since entering the working world. I wish I could say that I ditched work to enjoy a day out on the town with friends, soaking in the food, culture and sport of Boston; truth be told, I spent most of the day curled up on the couch. I ventured outside mid-morning, but only to purchase orange juice, palliatives, tissues and to rent The Road to Perdition, which seemed like just the sort of morose drama to get me back on my feet again.

I was hoping for a big parade and an opportunity to lip synch to Twist and Shout but I guess I picked the wrong day.
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mattchun 2/26/2003 06:20:00 PM [+] ::
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NO PAIN, NO GAIN?

One swollen, purple left ankle.
One mildly sprained thumb.
One contusion, left thigh.
One puffy right eye.
One bruised pride.
One loss.

...and oddly enough, I can't wait until we play again.
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mattchun 2/25/2003 10:26:00 AM [+] ::
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THE INSPIRATION STRIKES MAILBAG

I know you've all been waiting with bated breath (or was that a yawn?), so here are the answers to all of your questions about...

...MATT IN GENERAL:
I'm a Leo. I'm the youngest of five children. I have an older brother and three older sisters. I wear both boxers and boxer briefs, though not at the same time. I don't really have much of a townie accent, except at Red Sox games (Nomahhh!), but I do know that you can't pahk yah cah in Hahvahd yahd. I subscribe to the adage "neither a borrower nor a lender be." It is true what they say and it's better to be safe than sorry. In a hundred years, I'll be entertaining (scaring) my great-great-grandkids with strange songs and crotchety old stories. Either that, or I'll be pushing up daisies.

...WORK AND EDUCATION:
I work in management strategy, specifically for the telecom industry. It's about as ambiguous as it sounds. Sometimes I enjoy what I do and sometimes I don't; right now it's sorta fun. At different points in my life, I briefly, though not seriously, considered careers in the arts and the military. Click and Clack, the Tappit Brothers, spoke at my college commencement.

...THINGS I INGEST
I like green vegetables, including broccoli. This is a drastic turnaround from my childhood when my preferred diet consisted of pancakes and candy. My favorite cereal is Honey Bunches of Oats, though lately I've been skipping breakfast. My current soda order of preference is Dr. Pepper, Coke then Pepsi, though this seems to vary throughout the year. My pain reliever of choice is Advil.

...RANDOM AND SUNDRY ACTIVITIES:
My favorite places to read are the T and my bed. My favorite hockey team is the Boston Bruins; a close second is my college intramural team ("The Tripods"). I've rolled my left ankle so many times playing basketball that it clicks when I run. I can make a popping sound with my pinkie and my ear. When driving, I occasionally pass from the right (when the slow-ass jerk in front of me won't get out of the way). I have never been to Disneyland, Disneyworld, or Euro-Disneyland. I don't spend enough time in NYC and I hope to visit sometime soon. I've never killed a man and I don't listen to enough Johnny Cash.

I hope you've enjoyed peering through the looking glass. Any shocks or surprises? If you asked questions, what are your answers?
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mattchun 2/24/2003 02:48:00 PM [+] ::
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